I met another Angel

My girls both believe in the magic of fairies and Angels. And I believe in the magic of my girls...
but the Angels I speak of here are as real as you and I and work as healers in the broad sense of the word.

When I stop to think about all the angelic healers I've met in my life I realise I could fill a book with those experiences. The kinesiologist I once knew who, although dying of breast cancer (unknown to me at the time), treated me with such devotion, love and care...the psychologist who knew well enough that what I needed most was to have someone help me laugh at my crazy thoughts and make a lightness of it all...the angels at Tresillian who took me under their wings and carried me through the sleeplessness of motherhood to the saner side of the river...

This morning I saw another angel, disguised as an osteopath. She treated my 2.5year old fairy's condition with such keen interest and focus and love that I came away feeling both connected and satisfied, for myself and my daughter, that she was in the hands of an angel (a professional with an open heart and healing intentions).

But sometimes angels come in other forms...like the new mum friends I made when Lily started school in 2009...and the my new neighbours...and the strange woman in the bookshop who hugged me with her eyes when she realised I was looking through the 'stress and anxiety' section.

As a mother, finding a professional angel healer is so incredibly wonderful, especially when you're searching for answers and hitting dead-ends. To meet an angel can make all the difference in how we treat our children, or ourselves, and how we live our lives. The shifts can be subtle or profound, and can have amazing effects well beyond the symptoms you're having treated at the time.

There are things I'll never understand about healing and health, like why innocent children get sick and die and why beautiful, kind, loving mothers can get cancer and leave their little ones...

But one thing I have seen and felt and BELIEVE to be true...is that LOVE plays an enormous part in healing.

Remember life before FACEBOOK? iPhones? SmartTVs? Internet? Time to de-stress from e-stress...

Remember the days before Facebook, internet and mobile phones? When being away from your homephone meant you couldn't be reached and people were paid to sit at desks and take paper messages for other people who were busy in meetings and uncontactable?

Plenty of good has come with the advent of technology but I can't help wonder whether being more AVAILABLE has enhanced our lives, especially as mothers.

Have we simply become like walking 7/11 stores, always open for business? How many times have heard someone say: 'but didn't you get my email/ text/ IM/ Facebook message?'

Once upon a time, at 5pm Fridays, pubs were full of people celebrating the end of another week and the expectation they'd be free of work until 9am Monday. But both my husband and I have recently received Sunday morning emails with the expectation of a response that same day.  How rude! The trick is, of course, not to respond until 9am Monday or better still, don't check your emails until 8.59am.

I was recently gifted an iPhone, for which I'm completely grateful. But I have come to learn the hard way that in order to have some true peace and quiet during evenings and weekends, the iPhone (with its beeping email inbox and whirring text) has to be turned off (or atleast silenced).

I've seen many a parent at the park, pool or beach head down, texting, occasionally glancing up for a child safety check. I do it myself. I'm guilty. This is not a criticism, more an observation. The question begs: what were we all doing before texting and Facebook? Having more conversations with our partner or friends? playing with the kids? Reading a magazine or newspaper? Sleeping?

I was not surprised to hear a Tresillian staffer of 30 years express that one of the deepest concerns they had for mothers and children was the amount of time parents are spending online. It seems our online-lives are eating up our off-line real ones.

And this texting and Facebook thing is kind of addictive. If you're not careful you can find yourself with an uneasy feeling in your gutt, wondering what you were meant to do that you've forgotten, only to remember you haven't been in Facebook for 24 hours and need to check in to get your fix.

I recently decided to detox my inbox and get rid of all those email newsletters I never have time to read or file away for 'later'. I also committed to Facebook Fridays, to keep myself off it the other six days a week. Didn't last long...

My family got together recently for my mother's birthday and - for the first time in a long time - we had a e-free event. No one was texting or beeping or downloading. It wasn't until the next day that I realised we'd coped without our digital fixes.

I know...all things in moderation. But like most things in the home, I've been given the job of internet, TV and iPod moderator...known as the fun police! Weekdays aren't as much of a problem - the lines are clear and the kids too busy to tune in. But weekends are harder to patrol and I'm constantly turning off the digital entertainment and beckoning my family to play and interact the old fasioned way!

Great 'Digital Detox' article at Wellbeing online...

Springcleaning My LIFE...It's gotta be done cause life's CRAZY busy!

Spring has sprung! And it feels like the year's just flying past. When I look at what lies ahead between me and Christmas, it's overwhelming: loads of client work, school holidays, an at-home wedding to plan and a full-on two year old.
...It's easy to fall into full speed ahead this time of year, but I've decided to Spring Clean my life in order to (try) to avoid complete overload and burnout!!!
So I asked myself:
'What could I give up, let go of, complete, delegate, declutter or do differently that would SIMPLIFY my life and bring me FREEDOM, time, space and PEACE rather than madness?!@#'

I was inspired into action by the fact my neice, who'd I'd asked to help sort my tax receipts, managed to do in under 3 hours would have probably taken my until Christmas.
So here are some of the possibilities I came up with:
- Postpone till 2012 the 12 week online business course I recently signed up with.
- Postpone till 2012 building my new superdooper MumSanctuary website.
- Get my 2010/2011 tax out of the way (with the help of my super efficient neice).
- Get ruthless with tossing out/ giving away the loads of STUFF that's grown in our storage.
- Start grocery shopping online.
- Get ride of all those online subscriptions that I never ever have time to open and read and keep only my favourite 3.
- Limit my Facebooking to once a week.

Doesn't matter where I start, making any of these changes will help make breathing space in my life. The trick, of course, will be resisting the urge to fill up that space with yet MORE STUFF!
Happy spring cleaning.

Lyndal
;0)

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When I am at PEACE...magic happens!

Zen Garden. http://www.blueangelonline.com/

I dropped into a local park today with Amy (18 months) after a quick trip to the supermarket. My mind had been racing all morning. I couldn't stop thinking about all the things I needed to this week and knew I couldn't get started until Amy had her lunchtime sleep.
I was feeling the great pressure of the job hunt and impatient for a result. At the same time, I was trying to figure out how to maintain my daily writing ritual, plus catch up on my taxes, plus plan for the school holidays (fast approaching).
I fell into OVERWELM...then, I remembered, really remembered, the only way to end this peaceless-ness, this restless-ness is to surrender to THIS VERY MOMENT. Here in the park, my only job is to be present with my girl, to have fun with her.
Work and job searching, and tax and tonight’s dinner and school holiday plans...can all WAIT! Once I surrender, really let go and become fully present, magic happens. Children start to chat to me and involved me in their games. I’m like a fun magnet. Amy and I have a wonderful time together. She comes away exhausted from the play. I come away feeling energized and lighter than when I arrived.
Two years ago I attended a retreat for mums up here in the Blue Mountains. One of the discussions was about PEACE and how we LOSE OUR PEACE THROUGH THE PROCESS OF THINKING. It's said the true nature of peace is silence, but I don't that neccessarily means COMPLETE silence. For me, today, in the park, it was just a matter of silencing the chatter of my own mind; the chatter of all that needed to be done, and pay attention ONLY to what was happening right in front of me and around me in that incredible park full of beautiful ,happy children and sunlight and autumn's first leaves.
 
At the mum's retreat, we were asked to write our own poem/ piece of writing titled:  'When I am at peace'. Here's what I wrote then. And I feel the same way now.
 
When I am at peace...all is well in my world. Love surrounds me, all I do, all I experience. I bring peace and love into my heart and home, my conversations, my work, my joyful everyday living.
When I am at peace, I feel like moving, easily, naturally, outdoors, working with my body, filling my mind with positive energy and love and laughter. When I’m at peace I laugh more, dance more with my daughter and move with a grace that flows effortlessly and beautifully along life’s river.
I LOVE PEACE
I AM PEACE,
I CHOOSE PEACE

What happens when YOU are at peace?

You Sexy Mother...a life-changing approach...

Just finished reading You Sexy Mother - a life-changing approach to motherhood by Jodie Hedley-Ward... a self-help title which "...redefines what it means to be a stay-at-home mum today."

Not a huge fan of self-help, particularly for mothers, but forced my way through the first few pages. It was worth the effort. Thought I'd write a brief review. Read it yourself? Let me know what you think...

Like all self-help books, it’s a matter of helping yourself to the bits that suit you and your lifestyle at this point in your motherhood. It’s no one-size-fits-all, but has something for every mother. My advice is to go straight to page 70 and read – several times: ‘We all face our own unique set of challenges, which is why comparing ourselves with others or trying to follow another mother’s blueprint will never work, and it will certainly never make us feel happy.’
This woman’s enthusiasm is incredible; you can feel her jumping off the pages. So, it’s ideal for the mother who’s ready to change gear and shake things up.
Ward has loads of great ideas to try on for size, including getting creative with play spaces in your home, transforming your wardrobe from drab to hip, and creating chill out zones in your home where you can relax throughout the day.
Favourite advice: Assess your energy levels each morning and approach the day accordingly. I love this approach, rather than ‘dragging’ yourself through a day for the sake of crossing items off a long to-do list. Pursue your passions: I think that just like exercise, the stuff you do for yourself gives you energy. It’s when we waste time doing things because we think we should that we feel drained and depleted.
Favourite exercise: ‘Let’s Go Shopping’ where you write yourself a pretend cheque, dress up in your finest and head out with the intention of spending the whole lot on yourself and your home. It might sound a ridiculous time-waster at first, but it’s a great way to shop like a pro, see what looks great on you and – in my case – shrug off the guilt monkey and try on some items with a higher price tag than $30.
Bummed out reading: ‘When you are at your most vulnerable, sleep-deprived and emotional, that is when it is most important to choose your words wisely and remember just how important this relationship is to the stability and happiness of your family.’ – too late for me.
Life Changing? If you're into it, lives up to its promise: “...redefines what it means to be a stay-at-home mum today...”
Overall: Worth owning, reading and lending to any mum (with the page 70 warning) who’s ready and ripe for change.

Mother's Thursday FANTASY...sheer lunacy!

After 17 months at home with her mum, my todder (Amy) has started one day a week at Family Daycare. Finding a daycare spot that's local, available and perfectly suitable is like winning lotto as far as most mothers are concerned. This one came with glowing references and is walking distance from my house - perfect!
So as soon as I could see bub-free Thursdays on my horizon I began to fantastise about my ideal Thursday. It goes something like this:




6am rise for daily morning 'Me-time' Ritual*
10-15 mins yoga, 10-15 mins meditation, 30 min sunrise stroll, followed by a dry body scrub, almond oil naked rub down (self-applied), citrus essential oil shower, finished with cup of jasmine green tea - all before waking the kids.
Relaxing breakfast with kids. Robert makes Lily's school lunch, I pack Amy's daycare bag and off we trot merrily at 8.30am on the dot. Return around 9.15am to start my day...
Work in my office 'till 11.45am then pick up my elderly friend for our weekly luncheon date. (Eat something scrumptions and healthy). Return to my desk by 1.30 for another 4 hours of work before picking up the kids and coming home for an early dinner I've organised the night prior.

March 3 is my third attempt at Fantasy Thursdays. Week one I was flat out sick on the couch. Week two Bob was flat out grumpy with a case of facial shingles. So, here we are week 3 growing ever eager to fulfill my Thursday Fantasy. Here's how it went (my Thursday, March 3 REALITY):

1.30am: Woken at by cockatoo screech of teething toddler who refuses to be consoled in her own cot and insists on lying on the floor (in makeshift bed) slapping mum's face and poking her for over an hour. Give it my absolute best shot to remain cool, calm and collected until - after two hours of wrestling and screaching - I restrain her in a sleeping bag and leave her to screach herself to sleep. I'm on her floor with an earplug in one ear cheering her on, lovingly. (Mothers need medals for nights like this!Or some sort of government funded stress/ sleep debt bonus!!)
We both settle into sleep around 4am for what seems like 5 minutes.
7.30am: Woken by that all-to-familiar cockatoo screach. Desperate for a shower, I hand her over to Bob and Lily. One minute into my shower she's banging on the shower door, balling and calling for muuuuuuuuuuuuum! Shower is short and not so sweet but it'll have to do.
7.45am: Remember we have unexpected houseguests who, without a doubt, lost a couple of hours of sleep last night. Stuff breakfast into kids. Realise we're out of just about everything. Send Bob for a desperate run to the shops. Run to the verandah to add jam to Bob's list. Lean over the railing to get his attention. Already driving out in the car. In desperation, throw 1/2 piece of avocado toast at the car windscreen. Leaves a HUGE smudge but he fails to notice ('till I'm explaining the green smudge when we're back in the car 45 minutes later).
8am: I'm crawling across a landscape of clean, unfolded laundry on my bedroom floor desperatly seeking school socks. Find a second sock and feel momentarily victorious. Hand them to Lily. She informs me they're not matching. My inner dragon wants to scream 'I DONT GIVE A FLYING ....!'. Fortunately my sleep deprived seven second delay has kicked in, so I respond with: 'That's OK darling, just roll them down.'
8.25: Like the Rooster I am (Chinese astrology), I announce our departure in 5 minutes, then realise only two toddler wipes remain. Not even the most resourceful daycare worked could stretch those over an 8 hr day with my daughter's butt! Plan to pick up wipes between drop offs.
8:40am: Say good morning to the emerging houseguests. Load the family into the car. Win the toddler arch back battle squeezing her into the seat. Explain the avocado windscreen smudge. Listen to three people talking at once throughout the trip. Brain begins to melt and all three voices start to merge into one. I answer no questions, just nod. I notice a school boy being tossed into a skip bin by another, with several onlookers, and don't even apply a brake. (7 second delay...)
8.55am: Drop Lil at school gate. So distracted by Bob (and sleepy) I almost run over the lollipop man at the crossing, who (usually) bids me good morning. Wake myself with ice cold car air conditioning.
9am: Drop Bob at the station, pick up some wipes at the supermarket and head to daycare.
9:15am: Arrive at daycare. Amy clutching me like a newborn koala. She eventually relaxes and begind busying herself when I realise her shoes are on the wrong feet (explains the strange walk).
9:30am: Leave daycare swiftly, ignoring cries and wait outside the door to hear hear her settle (only 30 seconds of guilt, thank God).
9:40am: Arrive home to my houseguests. Sit and chat while stuffing my face with my first cup of tea and some breakfast.
10am: Set up houseguests with activities for the day. Put on a load of washing. Look at my list of to-do's...

• Finish business Marketing plan
• Do all 6 loads of washing
• Set up 3-4 work meeting for next week
• Travel 20 mins down the mountain for dental x-ray
• Pick up Jill for lunch
• Organise dinner for houseguests and their visitors

Revise list:

• Forget business Marketing plan...brain asleep
• Wash essentials...clean undies & tomorrow's uniform
• Stay off the phone
• Forget dental x-ray...avoid unneccessary driving (they say driving without sleep is like driving drunk)
• Pick up Jill for lunch
• Pick up sausages, onions and buns for hotdogs (dinner) and suggest guests go OUT to visit after dinner.

11.45am: Head out to pick up Jill for lunch. On the way, fill the car with petrol and myself with 2 Cherry Ripes! Eat one immediately. Spot a truck on the opposite side of the highway, its wheels have come off and are rolling up the road into a service station. A man filling his tank watches nervously. I miss the end but laugh at how fitting the scene is in this somewhat MAD day.
12noon-1.45pm: Lunch with my friend and laugh at the day. Drop her at home and scoff second Cherry Ripe.
2pm: Arrive back home, chat to houseguests briefly and look again at my to-do list.
2.30pm - 4.00pm: I SLEEP a deep, deep sleep and dream a little dream of next week's Thursday ...
4.00pm: Wake, splash water on face. Apply minimal 'healthy look' make-up, drink cup of digestive tea to deal with unhealthy lunch and two Cherry Ripes. Head off to pick up kids...

Be surprised...it's Monday AGAIN!?

Another Monday, another week...same old same old! There's a weekly - even daily - deja vu that comes with motherhood and the routine work it brings. Another wet towel, another uniform to iron, another morning running late, another week ahead...
It's so easy to get completely swamped by the ROUTINE of mothering and managing that it feels like life has no surprises left. On one hand, having some routine can make family functioning a whole lot easier. On the other hand, routine and 'control' can become so consuming and addictive that the surprises go un-noticed, fade into the background of daily living. It can feel like to 'fun police' have raided your life and left nothing but a treadmill to run through the day.
So, how do you bring back some of the fun stuff, the laughs, the spontaneity? You can always schedule a few laughs, just like 'quality time'. Or, you can take a chance and surrender to just one of the hundreds of opportunities that beckon you each day, to take a moment, have some fun.
It might take a while to recognise them, but they are there.
So, this Monday, if you feel like it's just another Monday, try being SURPRISED by anything...

Keep your cool when it's stinkin' hot!

They say it's been the hottest Australia Day in 30 years and I bloody believe 'em! God bless air conditioning...And with the end of school holidays within reach it's so easy to get overheated and lose it with your kids when you're so close to the finish line, especially when you're walking around like the sweaty family (mum sweaty, dad sweaty and a bunch of little sweety sweaties).
No matter how sweet or cute your kids are, when the weather gets hot every question sounds like a whinge and every request just too much to bear. I should know...Only yesterday at around 5.30pm after a day with 4 needy, sweaty girls I was suddenly hit with a bad case of IDGAS. What's IDGAS? It's when you're so damn hot and exhausted that the simplest question or request gets a response like: 'I Don't Give a Shit!' (IDGAS). And as it leaves your mouth you can feel yourself shrink back with self-loathing. (Thinking it is one thing but actually saying it feels entirely different).
Anyway, after a quick yet sincere apology I decided it was time we all chilled out in the local pool. Yes, it was 6pm. Yes, it would mean a late dinner. But hey, we'd be a happier bunch!

So, when we were warned about today's 40+ temp, I decided, no matter how hot and stinky it got, I'd keep my cool. So I put my IDGAS preventation plan in place:

(a) Loads of water - drinking it, swimming in it, putting feet into it!
(b) Hats, shade and air conditioning
(c) Rosewater face spray kept in handbag
(d) So NO to anything that's too hard or too hot

Worked today...tomorrow's a mild 37 degrees but will keep the survival strategy in place...Stay cool!
Lyndal
;0)

SuperMum is SuperDumb...results are in!

The proof is in...a SMH article by Sue White 'Multitasking taken to task', tells us 'neuroscience technologies have led scientists to conclude...while we may be able do one or two simple tasks simultaneously, we aren't wired to multi-task.'

It says multitasking is 'an inefficient way of using the brain' and 'tires out the mind and reduces your ability to be mindful.' Hello! Might be news to the rest of the world but modern mothers - caught in the work/life IMBALANCE have known this for ever. Add to the million and one jobs most mothers try to do in a day the fog of sleep deprivation and you have a melting pot of mindmash!
Just this morning, after a rough, sleepless night with a 7 year old's bad dreams and endless tossing in my bed, I found it difficult just to spread Vegemite on one slice of toast and peanut butter on the other. It wasn't till I sat down to eat with my cuppa that I realised they both landed on the same slice (not a great taste combo!)

The article recommends 'unitasking', doing just one task at a time, for a period of say 30 minutes, suggests using earplugs to avoid distraction. Such a suggestion would make any mothe laugh out loud. Personally, 30 minutes is an absolutely luxury of focus time in my house and only possible when my toddler's asleep and 7 year old's at school.
There's certainly some sense to the findings. I started advocating for greater 'brain balance' for mothers in 2006 when I ran my first Meditation for Mothers workshop. The amount of 'shit shuffling' mothers do in their everyday - washing, cleaning, cooking, working, negotiating, feeding, socialising, nit controlling, forward planning - it's little wonder we've little time and patience to gently nurture and love our children's needs.
I think we've been fed more than a few BIG FAT LIES about what it means to be a mother - to control everything our kids eat and do and wear and say and hear and watch and learn and practice - that we have no time left to enjoy BEING MUM.
If the experts want mothers to start unitasking I'm all for it! I just think they'll be in for a rude shock when they start seeing kids leaving the house in yesterday's clothes with unbrushed hair and unmatched socks.
And the best excuse to give the daycare or school staff when they glare at your new low standard? 'Yes, well I decided to UNITASK this morning.'

How do you survive the school holidays?

Just got back from a 4 night child-free holiday. The holiday was extraordinary - grown up food, grown up conversations (lasting longer than 30 secs), even a grown-up party. It was sensational!!!
My 7 year old was so excited to see mummy home she insisted on staying home from school so we could build and make stuff together (bless her).It sounded perfect. It wasn't until I was standing in the health food store answering her questions while hip-balancing my toddler and searching desparately for my purse that reality bit me fair on the arse.
'It's under your arm,'said the shop assistant.'I explained to her I'd been out of (juggling) practice for 4 days, paid for my goods and headed home with the tribe.
By 5pm it was witching hour (me, not the kids), and I realised that today x 42 = school holidays!
4 days in paradise reminded me of how much my mind and body LOVE time to myself. One day back at home reminded me of just how difficult that can be to find during school holidays.
I'd been recently planning school holidays activities for boredom's sake. Now I realise I need to build in lazy days at home and daily me-time for sanity's sake. I'm thinking early morning yoga and walks while the kids are asleep, lazy days at home with home made ice blocks and favourite kids movies, and lots and of early nights (for me too!).
How do you survive the school holidays? Share your comments here or on our Facebook page.

OMG it's December! Never fear, L I S T M A K E R is here!!!

The kids might be overjoyed but December 1 can send a sense of panuic through the minds of mums all over the modern world. Christmas is only a month away and SO MUCH TO DO! Don't panic...as a reformed Virgo once know as 'the L I S T M A K E R' (said in an Arnold Schwarzneger type voice) I'm more than eager to share my years of experience in 'to-do' list creation.
A list can help you get organised and free up your mind, but if you're not careful it can create a prison of MUST-DO's that can create even more stress. So, grab a piece of paper and a pen for my Virgo tips for creating a list to help get you through the silly season and save your sanity:


1. Start with a DOWNLOAD - Just start writing any TO-DOs that have been buzzing around your head. Take your time to completely download all of the things you think you need to do, even the minor things like buy wrapping paper or bigger things like shopping for food for Christmas Day. Keep writing until you feel your mind is free of these. (Don't be too overwhelmed about what you see in front of you...better out than clouding up your mind!)
2. Sift and SEPARATE - Circle or underline those things you consider urgent or really, really, really important.(If they have a deadline, put that date next to them).
3. Letting go - Are there any things you can either let go of, delegate to someone else, or do more simply (eg online or over the phone?). This is a great process to repeat several times between now and Christmas, especially if you're feeling overwhelmed.
4. Less is MORE - Remember, the less you have on your list to DO, the more time you have for YOU and your family! More time to create and enjoy the Christmas/ holiday period YOU WANT!
5. Make it a WISHLIST - At the top of a fresh piece of paper write 'My Christmas Wishlist'. Spend a few minutes thinking about how you want Christmas to FEEL for you this year. If it's usually mad and stressful, you might prefer a calmer, more joy filled one. Write one sentence about the experience YOU WANT this time around. (We spend so much time making Xmas special for others and rarely think about how we'd like to experience it!).

Then, transfer your list items across to this new 'wishlist', keeping in mind what you've 'sifted and separated' and any 'letting go' you've been able to do. Put your list in your diary, on the fridge or stuck on the inside a kitchen cupboard where you can add to it, take away or tick off. Remember, less (to do) is more (FOR YOU!).

Remember too that being organised can make life easier but PERFECTION is over rated and exhausting!!!

Happy Christmas preparations,
Lyndal

4 nights without kids...is that possible?

...anything is possible! It's been 14 months since bubs arrived and way too long since I've had a child-free break. I know this to be true because I get this strange itch I need to scratch ( I also start going a little nuts!!!)
So, in one week's time I'm heading off to Byron for 4 nights with a wonderful dear friend. For 4 days I'll have music and markets and early morning walks and maybe even fabulous cocktails, instead of dinners to cook and beds to make and clothes to wash and a bum to wipe and bodies to bathe.
It's not that I don't LOVE being a mum. In fact, it's because I love being a mum that I'm so looking forward to my break. I've met some mothers who could not imagine holidaying without their kids. For me, a few days away from the madness and everydayness of motherhood is priceless and injects a new energy and zest that's much needed and most welcome. I know it's not always possible...to take the time away for your SELF. I'm grateful I have the support in my partner to go. But most importantly I'm grateful I have the ability to let go - for just a short while - of the need to control what my chidlren eat, drink and wear and when they sleep and play...And I know my heart will overflow when I'm back with my gorgeous girls, a little more carefree...

Busy mum? Dare to dream...

As a busy mum, the idea of taking time from the daily doing of motherhood to tune into your DREAMS for the future might seem like a futile waste of time.
Let's face it, sometimes it's hard to find time to pee alone!


But a recent incident reminded me of the power/ magic/ whatever you'd like to call it of planting seeds in your own garden of possibility.
As a writer, I've turned to journalling for many years as a way of doing this. I wondferful woman I once worked with taught me how to write down your future 'as if it's happening right now'. I've done this in my journal over the years and have been amazed at how dreams can gradually unfold in their own time.
I once saw Oprah doing a dream board and decided to try it myself. Mine is attached here (see pic). The AMAZING thing I realised lately is that I made and photographed it a YEAR-TO-THE DAY before my second child was born. So, even before her 'seed' was planted, my mind was doing the work!
See the gorgeous woman (bottom right) staring out from a drop-pool...I swam in one of those amazing pools on an island holiday with my sisters last February. See the woman sitting poolside (bottom left). That's me on my 4 night child-free holiday next month (more on THAT later!).
I know these boards are merely images and dreams and it's mostly about how I'd like my life to feel rather than be! But the fact is, my life really is feeling more and more like this picture every day.
If you'd asked my 18 months ago, pregnant and suffering panic attacks, or even six months ago, exhausted and in PND mode, if I thought any of this was possible, I'd shake my head. In fact I hid this dream board away for quite some time. But bringing it back out has made me realise that sometimes your dreams just sneak up on you...
Why not try a Dream Board yourself?
Or, for a different approach, you could start with creating your 'Dream Week' or 'Dream Life' with a dream mentor expert. My friend Alison Nancye is just that! Check out her site and book Recipes for Everyday Life. If you buy her book (full of 25 'life recipes'), it could possible be the best Christmas present you could ever give yourself!
Lyndal
;0)

Work Life Balance for WAHMs: 'Closing the Door' on work

I've just hoped off an online chat with a group of working mums at Connect2Mums (tautology, I know, all mums work their butts off!!!). Sooooooooo many WAHMs (Work-at-Home Mums) I speak to talk about the challenges of 'Work Life balance'.

One of the hardest things - I find - is when you 'leave' your home office and walk around with a 'hangover' (work thoughts buzzing around your head while kids buzz around your feet reminding you of all the other things you need to do PLUS the fact you haven't yet decided what to feed the beasties for dinner!)

I recently wrote a simple meditation mantra and have been using this for myself - at my desk - several times a day. I've got loads of stuff going on at the moment (who hasn't!?) I'm using this technique when I feel OVERWHELMED by all there is to do OR when I need to CLOSE THE DOOR on work and get back to being mum.

Feel free to try the Work Life Balance 'Closing the Door' meditation here. Plus, here's...

4 simple steps to 'Close the Door' on your working day:
1. Be Timely - Towards the end of your work time/day, start winding down. To keep your eye on the time you could use http://ticktocktimer.com/
2. Wind down your thoughts - During your wind down time, jot down anything weighing on your mind that might 'hangover' into your family time.
3. Ritual ending - Perform some kind of ritual that closes down your work mind (turning off the computer, closing blinds, pushing in a chair).
4. Close the door - Physically and mentally close the office door. (If you don't have a designated office find a way to 'close down').

Try finishing off with the Work Life Balance 'Closing the Door' meditation before getting back to the family or heading off to bed.

Best of luck,
Lyndal

Spring has sprung...

The Spring Equinox is just over a week away, and so's my bub's first birthday. Time for me to Springclean my mind rather than feeling stressed and overwhelmed about the looming Christmas rush. Time to celebrate bub's beautiful blossoming in her first year and ME as her mum...
If you're on the other side of the globe, autumn/ fall is a great time to 'let go' of anything that's just not serving you as a mum. Just this morning, after returning from a busy family weekend away, I could feel myself sinking under the piles of washing and the 'to-do's of work and family life.
Then I remembered to tune in to what makes me feel good, to how I want to feel in my everyday, and to what really matters to me. I took a few minutes to reflect on these things and let go of the tension of 'what I think I SHOULD be doing'.
I was inspired by my friend and mentor Alison Nancye, who says in her book 'Recipes for Everyday Life', 'Lead with your heart and the rest will follow...'. She appeared on Kerri-Anne's show (Ch 9) just last week sharing her remarkable story.

• Check out this super cute 4 min video of Babywisdom on our Laugh + Play page. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll love it!
• Essential Baby has launched a new birth section on its site. http://www.essentialbaby.com.au/birth
• Interesting Forum thread on BubHub about the mask of motherhood and whether we have a public and private face.
• Spending too much time on the internet? Finding yourself frequently falling into a cyberhole? Then check out a time-saving solution on out Time + Energy page.
• Need a quick de-stress? Try the Alternate Nostril Breathing exercise.

On the way home from the weekend trip yesterday, we stopped in at a park to stretch the legs. Lily, my 7 year old offered to push a little girl on the swing. Later, her mum came up and thanked Lily for her kindness then turned to me and thanked me for raising such a wonderful girl. The simple gesture made me feel surprisingly good. It's so much easier to hear prasie for your child than it is to receive it for yourself...

Take care, Lyndal ;0)

Mum Sanctuary launches on the Full Moon

Hello out there...

Hello and welcome to my blog, mum's sanctuary. I started this blog for a number of reasons:

1. Motherhood is mentally and physically EXHAUSTING!
2. I function best when I take time out for ME.
3. If I give all of myself to everyone else I become a BITCH!
4. I need to spend time as a human BEING, not just a human DOING all the time.
5. As a mum, looking after ME does not come naturally.
6. My instinct tells me many other mums feel the same.

As you'll see from my other motherhood blog - http://motherloadtomotherlove.blogspot.com/ - I'm a woman of many words. I love to write and talk. But, I've decided to keep this blog really SIMPLE! (Just select from the menus bar at the top). Short, simple ideas for you to try. There's no one-size fits all; some things might work for you, others probably won't. Pick and choose.

Here’s a poem I wrote the week my baby turned six months old after two nights without sleep. Little did I know I had another whole week ahead of me…temperatures, sleeplessness, viruses and a first tooth. And that was just bub. Lily (6 ½ years) was spending her evenings coughing, sleep walking and crying and hubby was working late almost every night.

edges of me, by Lyndal Edwards

When I'm exhausted
the world seems flat
my kids annoying, my husband useless
the day too daunting.

I want to scream "leave me alone"
and retreat like a bear
to a deep, dark cave
until my wintery mood passes.

My elastic band of love
snaps painfully back as
I think and feel and sometimes say
those things I know are not OK.

And with each passing moment
life offers me the chance to dance and love again
the sun's warmth, my daughter's joy
an endless invitation to step out of the void.

Sometimes I fight the fight
that later makes no sense
to stay exhausted, deluded
to show those I love the edges of me I despise.

And sometimes I surprise myself
And emerge from my exhaustion
like a lotus from the mud.

I open to the sun and the
Love that surrounds me
Effortless and Beautiful.
Anything is possible.